The Freedom to Grieve
Written by Mike Shreve, Chaplain for Texas Hospice
Ecclesiastes 3:4 "a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,"
As a Hospice Chaplain for Texas Hospice, I have the honor to meet families in the most fragile of moments. Each patient's situation comes with its own nuances. The common theme of all the patient family dynamics is that grief is eminent, the way in which each individual and family handles the grief takes a variety of forms.
Entering into each patient's world I am challenged by the Lord to be sensitive to His leadership and how He is working in the lives of those people. Each patient comes into their time of crisis, facing declining health and a terminal illness, from varying spiritual outlooks and yet there is one common comforter. The comfort that can be found in Christ surpasses the hurt, anger, and depression. The difficulty for many of those afflicted is the willingness to accept the grace that Christ extends to them.
For many of the people I see there is war being waged within. Some are afraid to grieve because it signifies giving up on the one that is on the edge of death. For many Christians, it is often perceived that if they grieve that they are somehow exhibiting a lack of faith in the Lord.
One Christian woman that I recently visited is harboring the pains of the loss of a child from seven years ago and now dealing with an ailing parent. She conveyed to me that she is still extremely mad at God and has been unable to pray for the last seven years. She spoke openly and readily through tears as though she desired for her wounds to be healed. Knowing all through the seven years that the only one that could help heal the intense pain was the one person she was unwilling to talk to.
It is a strange dynamic, but extremely powerful experience to give someone the knowledge of the freedom to grieve to the Lord. There is tremendous healing power that comes through a person who cries out to the Lord yielding and open to His grace to be exhibited.
Psalm 119:28 "My soul weeps because of grief; strengthen me according to Your word." God awaits our cries with great anticipation. He desires more than anything for His creation to turn to Him and allow Him to reign in our hearts through the good times and also the painful times. Whatever our circumstance, we have freedom in Christ, including freedom to grieve.
