Category: Dementia

My yoke is easy

September 7th, 2009 · Dr. Brian Byrd · Dementia, Palliation Comments Off

One of our nurses told me about a recent fulfilling experience.  A precious man, still young in his 60’s, and preparing to fulfill with his wife some of their dreams of world travel, fell victim to an aggressive dementia.  The wife noticed some memory loss in her husband, and within 6 months he was in the advanced stages of dementia.

One can imagine the heart-breaking previous 6 months: hoping the doctors would find a cause and cure, not allowing oneself to believe the day to day mental disintegration, and refusing to accept what was reality because it was too painful.

Once they had resigned themselves to accept what was happening and what was going to happen, they called Texas Hospice.  After a couple of weeks of receiving our services, the wife mentioned to our nurse, “Once we found Texas Hospice it was like a big burden being taken off our shoulders.”

We humans, made in God’s image, can be agents of His comfort.  “Come to me you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

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The Long Goodnight

August 25th, 2009 · Dr. Brian Byrd · Dementia One comment

Last week, one of our Texas Hospice nurses mentioned a good bit of wisdom and a couple of telling stories about dementia care.  Here they are:

1) Within the day-in day-out struggle of dementia care, family caregivers often forget to interact with their loved ones.  It is understandable, given the load the caregiver is carrying.  But it is important for family members to move past routine and into personable interaction.  When a hospice staff person engages the patient in a level of conversation, the family will often remark at how talkative and expressive their loved one becomes. 

2) After the peaceful death of one of our patients who suffered from dementia, the family remarked, “I couldn’t have planned it any better.”

3) Dementia is an unpredictable disease.  It surprises even the most seasoned clinical staff.  One of our patients, normally  inexpressive,  had this conversation with our staff:

Patient: “You’re with hospice?”

Nurse: “Yes.”

Patient: “Will you stay with me?”

Nurse: “Of course I will.”

Patient: “Please don’t leave me.”

We view dementia as a scourge, and I think that view is appropriate.  The disease robs us of our mental faculties, relationships, and our ability to contribute and perform.  It creates new burdens in an already trying world.

 From listening to our patients and those who are famous among us, such as President Reagan, I have concluded that losing our function is more difficult to accept than losing our lives.

But isn’t it like God to create beauty out of something so awful?  I think these stories show a little of what wonderful experiences people  live out when dementia enters their world.

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